Brett Tilford

We don’t want people to be happy (by the term happy I’m thinking of their overall well being and quality of life).  Advertisers don’t want consumers to be happy. Employers don’t want employees to be happy. Churches don’t want members to be happy. Governments don’t want citizens to be happy. Parent’s don’t want kids to be happy.  Why, you ask?  It’s because we’re willing to exploit the desire human beings have to be happy for the opportunity to increase our own happiness.

Advertisers don’t make as much money from happy people. They make money from people who are unsatisfied and hope that the next purchase will do the trick.

Employers want unsatisfied “go getter” types who will trade their lives for the promise of a promotion. Happy people have lives outside of work.

Churches don’t want people to be happy because our major customer is the guilt ridden and depressed. Church services and events become dispensaries for getting “high on the spirit”.  If people are happy then we fear they won’t need God.

Governments don’t want people to be happy because the only way they measure success is by the GDP. This depends on a vibrant “American Dream” chasing workforce who also happen to be the consumers that fuel the demand for more shizz to be made. Get too many people saying, “I’m satisfied” and we might slip behind China! God forbid.

Parents don’t want happy kids because they’re harder to show off. Unhappy kids get honor roll bumper stickers for their parents SUV’s, are captain of every sports team, and get accepted to the top private schools… all before the 6th grade. Happy kids do what they’re good at and pretty much quit the other stuff.

Of course, I’m tempted to externalize this evil. To say the problem is those damn advertisers, employers, churches, governments, and parents. Not me. The problem is never me. Unfortunately, the truth is I am these things. I’m a marketer, business owner, church leader, voter, and parent and I’m willing to extort and manipulate the fact that people want to be happy.  I want them to be unsatisfied. That’s a motivating factor for them to buy from me, give my company a competitive advantage, financially support my church, add to my country’s GDP, or motivate my daughter to become the envy of the neighborhood at everything she does. I want them like a hamster on the wheel chasing that elusive dream… but never actually catching it.

Too bad. I think the world would be a better place if quality of life of those around me were my first priority.

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P.S. I recognize that not all advertisers, employers, churches, governments, and parents are like this all the time. My point is that we operate like this more than we’d like to admit.  Below is a breakdown of my estimations for how often each of the previously mentioned groups of people operate in ways that propagate unhappiness in human beings.

• Advertisers: 80%
• Employers: 75%
• Churches: 30%
• Governments: 50%
• Parents: 20%
• Brett: 1% (yes I’m lying)

This video really got me to thinking about beauty in the modern era. What a strange world we live in when people’s imperfections can disappear with the click of a mouse. Unbelievable.

I remember seeing a news piece a few years ago about a makeup artist who was so concerned with what was being communicated to young girls via the magazines they were reading, that she started going around the country raising awareness, her message was something to the effect of “These people are works of art, they aren’t real. No matter how much you diet or apply makeup you’ll never look like them. When they wake up in the morning they look just like you!”

I really do think that the whole “Barbie or bust” (no pun intended) idea of beauty is extremely destructive. What are we communicating to our children when every person’s skin they see, on T.V. or the drive by billboards, looks like a freakin mannequin. I can’t imagine the types of conversations I’ll have to have with my kids in a few years. My little girl will say, “Daddy, look at that lady on t.v.! She is so beautiful!” I’ll reply, “Well honey, she isn’t actually real. See there is this thing called photoshop that allows you to make people look perfect. It’s weird I know, but it helps people sell things.” God help me.

I think all this hits a little to close to home because I’m in the design business. Just a few months ago myself and Charles (the lead designer in our business) were working on a project together. The client had requested that we touch up a picture of one of his family members. It wasn’t anything big. However, once we got started it was so hard to stop! After fixing the teeth, we noticed that the eyebrows were a little bushy, and the eyes could probably be a little bigger. Also, that chin could afford to be a little smaller.  If we raised those cheekbones she looks older.  All of the sudden one of us (I honestly don’t remember who- I think it was Charles) yelled out, “Stop! We have to stop this!” He was right.But there was such power in that mouse. Razorburn? No problem, “click”-it’s gone. Dirty fingernails? Click-gone. Bags under the eyes? Click. Hair out of place? Click. Nose to big? Click. Eyes too small? Click. Cheek bones too low? Click. Skin to blotchy? Click. My God this is out of control. Now some nerd sitting in his apartment loft is deciding what beauty is? Scary.

When I think of Jesus I think of someone who seemed to be saying “God believes you are beautiful.  Hey you leper! God loves you and thinks you are beautiful.  Hey you drunk, God thinks you are beautiful.  All you outcasts and beggars, God thinks you are beautiful. It would be easy to pin all the blame on the advertising agencies of the world.  But you know what this comes back to all of us, because who is buying the way they are selling? Me and you. So maybe the point of the video isn’t to think, “How could those people?!”  But instead to turn that pointing finger back at myself and think, “Why don’t I live more like Jesus lived?”  Believing that everyone is beautiful.